Ommmmmmm

Slept like a baby here on my side of the hill last night. After I made sure to lock myself in as tight as I could.
Funny that.
I woke up at dawn, of course, like I always do. But I just turned over and went right back to sleep. And slept almost nine hours total. Ahhh...
Haven't done that in awhile.
Today, I just relaxed pretty much. It's been cloudy most of the day (even though now it looks like a terrific sunset is developing).
Went for a long drive all around the lake. First went one way all around, and then turned around and went the other way all around. Felt so good to drive. And I love the picturesque, windy road that hugs our lake.
I miss driving, that feeling of bye-bye, I'm taking off. That big old black-top stretching endlessly before me. What kind of American would I be if I didn't? Cars are in our DNA. Nothing like a good Interstate when you're feeling itchy.
And then being Italian too, means I have been known to drive fast -- on occasion. And I used to have a car that went fast. I've always had cars that go fast. Until now. Now I have a clunker. But I don't care. It's still fun to drive. At least it's a stick-shift clunker.
Soon, when I finish this, I'm gonna go sit on my terrace and watch the sun set.
And then I'm gonna make myself a plate of pasta. And maybe watch some silly Italian TV. (It's all silly.)
It feels good to just chill here alone. With my thoughts.
Not worrying about whether I'm this, or that, whether my attitude is good, or not, whether I'm in a good mood, or bad, or anything at all really.
Just being. Ommmm.

Odd Homecoming

I'm back on my side of the hill in Italy, arrived here late this afternoon. It felt kinda odd when I got here.
It was the first time in 10 years that I've ever arrived on my own. I always come with my husband. Once, I came with a girlfriend.
I've been here on my own, as you know. Even though this summer was the first time I've been here on my own too.
But now I actually came on my own as well, which felt different. Like, here I am, living here, and living in London too? I've been here more than two months this summer already.
My husband's in London still, working, but he's coming next week for a couple weeks, until the end of September. So I'm only alone this week.
It felt a little strange tonight, him there in London at home, me here in Italy at home. Two homes for the two of us.
Should I have just stayed in London with him instead of coming here early on my own? Came out when he could come out too? Felt a little guilty doing that.
I already feel summer closing in though, here too.
It's not that hot here now. Tonight, it's even a bit breezy.
I still have the living room doors open though. But now I have the iron grates locked in front of them.
I have to lock them every night, my husband says. And double-lock the front door. He's right, of course.
I locked the iron grates this evening when I went to the grocery store to pick up some food for dinner. And then I didn't open them again.
They're beautiful, sturdy iron with a graceful pattern, but I've never sat in the living room looking at the closed iron grates rather than the big glass windows before.
And soon I'll go to bed, for the first night since the robbers came.
Lots of firsts.
All a little strange here tonight.

Labor Day

It's weird when it's a holiday back home. Like today is Labor Day, for instance.
Not that I had even thought of it actually, but my son mentioned on the phone yesterday that he couldn't go to the bank today because well, it was Labor Day.
Do holidays still happen if you're not there?
Labor Day was always such a big deal, a strong punctuation mark in the year -- the end of summer, the beginning of school.
Not anymore.
First of all, they don't do Labor Day here -- and this is where I live. They did an end-of-summer Bank Holiday weekend last weekend, which I guess counts as their equivalent.
But it's not as big as Labor Day. It's just a Bank Holiday weekend, which comes at about the same time.
Then, more importantly, there's no school anymore, no kids to ready, no first-day packets to sign, no supplies to pick up, no back-to-school nights to mark on the calendar. My younger son went back to college in Charleston a couple weeks ago now. Colleges tend to go back long before Labor Day.
What else?
There's no three-day weekend off work like there used to be because I'm not working like that anymore. My two-week freelancing gig in London is done now, and the next time they want me is in three weeks time. They've said they need me a week a month from now on, which is a good start. But not for another three weeks.
Okay.
So, I guess I won't say good-bye to summer yet after all, even if it is Labor Day. And even though the Brits said good-bye pretty soon after they said hello.
I'll go back to Italy, where it's still hot, my neighbors tell me.
Even though I am a little scared of robbers now. I haven't spent a night there alone since I was robbed.
I can't let a gang of thieves put me off, though.
And I can't let thoughts of Labor Days past weigh me down.

What now?

How much can one family lose in a matter of a few weeks?
My elder son, now back in Washington, accidentally left his backpack at a bar at a friend's going away party the other night. When he went back to get it, he found his video camera, ipod, and British passport were gone. Add that to his wallet that was stolen in Barcelona last month, and the kid really doesn't have much left.
Not to mention no home in Washington.
Then there's the Macbook, digital camera and money that was taken when my house was burgled in Italy two weeks ago.
It has not been a good month for us in terms of possessions.
Thank god that's all they are in the end.
Even though you do get attached to them. He told me on the phone today that he misses his ipod. He was always listening to music. And I know he's going to miss his video camera soon too, which he used a lot to shoot videos he then posted on YouTube. It was his Christmas present last year. Oh well.
More important than the stuff, ultimately, is the fact that my son is flopping around in Washington now, staying in a friend's spare room, not sure what to do now, beyond wait to hear from Milan and get a new driver's license.
And we're here.
Something is wrong with this picture.
He should be staying with his parents if he has no job -- and now no stuff (got rid of all his college furniture and his ancient old car is on its last legs), shouldn't he?
Everything feels wrong.
Should he come here? Look for a job here too? He's intrigued by London, but will he like it? I'm not even sure I like it.
He doesn't have any friends here, doesn't know anyone at all, except us.
Is that enough when you're 23, almost 24?
Probably not.
What about if this thing in Milan doesn't happen after all? It is Italy, let's be serious.
Something has to give here soon.

Commuter Hell

I have just spent the last hour being crushed like a walnut in a nutcracker.
The Tube at rush hour.
Wow. Never seen it like that. And never seen anything quite like it.
I could tell it was bad as I was going down the escalator at the Piccadilly Circus station. There was a big crush of people turning the corner onto the platform, backing up onto the escalator. And when I finally got to the platform, people were lined up 10 deep as far as you could see.
After a couple minutes, a train arrived. But it didn't look like there was any room on the train at all, with commuters squished inside all the way to the door.
That didn't stop anybody, though.
The big crowd I was in just pushed towards the door, with lots of us just heaving in in between those who managed to get out. Nobody seemed to care about the announcement that another train would be coming soon.
I got in somehow, not sure how, ahead of a man who muttered "cheeky" to me as I was crushing in. It's not like I got in ahead of him. I was just part of the throng. And the door closed just behind me -- and ahead of him.
Sorry dude. I didn't mean it.
I stood up for the rest of the ride, smashed in between two other people, who I tried desperately not to actually touch. No chance of reading the paper I had bought. Even though other, more experienced commuters, still managed to read theirs somehow.
And god was I hot in my leather jacket.
The "cityness" of this mega-city cannot be underestimated. Washington just feels like a sleepy little town in comparison.
And there's nothing like the Tube at rush hour to remind you of that.
Whew.
It felt good to arrive at my stop, walk up the stairs en masse with a hundred other people and get out into the late evening sun.
I didn't even mind that I was suddenly freezing as I rode my bike home.

Swine flu

I didn't want to tell you this, but I think I've had the swine flu. Seriously.
I didn't want to tell you because I thought you'd think, gimme a break, she's lying. She can't have been robbed AND had the swine flu.
I am not making this stuff up, I swear.
I got really sick when I was in Italy after my son and his back-packing friends showed up. My son was sick when he arrived, I got sick, and then two of his three friends got sick too.
We all had fevers and then a phlegmy cough that just went on and on.
I had a fever for five days actually, and then a cough for about three weeks. It's actually just going away now.
I know I'm not infectious anymore because I didn't give it to my second son when he came -- or my husband when I saw him again. Plus it's been almost a month now since my first symptoms.
So don't get mad at me for going to work. A girl's gotta work -- even if she is recovering from the swine flu.
How do I know it was the swine flu?
I don't for sure, but what other bad flu is going around Europe this summer? And since when do you get the flu in the summer when it's 90 degrees outside? (God I was hot in Italy when I had a fever. I needed to just lay under the fan without moving a few times.) And the guys had been to dance clubs all around Italy and Spain -- perfect place to catch it.
Good news is, I've had the swine flu, so I don't need to worry about getting it this winter here in England, when they're predicting everyone's gonna get it.
I've had it. It's not fun.
One less thing to worry about.

What to Wear?

Nobody knows what to wear in this country.
Today, when I was leaving work, I saw women in sleeveless tops and summer skirts with sandals (and goose bumps), walking alongside women wearing leather jackets and Uggs.
Not that it's their fault.
When I went to work yesterday, it was chilly and overcast. When I came out, it was hot and the sun was blazing.
This morning, I felt overdressed in my cardy. It was kinda humid outside, and hot on the Tube. I almost stripped down to my sleeveless t-shirt.
This evening, when I came out, it was freezing. A brisk wind had come up. Although the sun was shining.
I feel like I need my entire summer and winter wardrobe with me every time I go out. (Would've loved to have my leather jacket this evening actually). I do carry my little portable umbrella in my bag now. But that's not enough, I'm realizing.
Maybe it's so changeable because it's summer. (ha). Maybe when it's actually winter, it'll just be cold, and that's it.
A lot of the women in the office wear leggings under their summer dresses. That's the only sure way to wear a summer dress, I'm finding. It's definitely a London look. I thought it was just trendy, but nope, that's a look borne of necessity.
Need leggings.
Tomorrow's gonna be good, though, I heard on the weather forecast.
Just windy and rainy all day.
Cool. I can dress for that.
It's the four seasons in one day that screw me.